Driving in Vermont is NOT like driving in or around major cities. Here, for the first time ever, is the real scoop on driving in the Green Mountain State.

First, a basic Geography Lesson: Vermont is long and somewhat thin. We have two major mountain ranges running north/south, effectively splitting the state into thirds. Vermont was laid out in the original platte system. This means towns are placed about 8 miles apart (more or less) in every direction.

A main road runs through each of the three major river valleys and several smaller ones. Rtes. 2, 7, 12 and 30 are examples. These roads are well maintained throughout the Winter season by Vermont's intrepid and hard working road crews. They are usually drivable in all but the biggest blizzards. Since the East/West Roads often cross mountain ranges, going can be slow during storms. Roads are often curvy and can get slippery. It is important to stay alert - especially during inclement weather. Be sure you have winter tires and 4WD during snow season (Dec to May).

Vermont is somewhat rare in that the main north/south highway often becomes a small town Main Street every 6-8 miles. This means you will have to slow down (often to 25mph) on a regular basis. Maintaining the speed limits is Vermont's local constabulary - a highly efficient ticket writing and income producing team. A constable is a locally elected and underpaid keeper of the peace, and is expected to meet expenses in part through speeding fines. Leading the charge is Nelson Tift, top ticket writer 3 years running now. He patrols Wallingford and Mendon part time. Pittsford, Brandon (always come to a full stop in Brandon), Rutland, Killington Access Rd, Woodstock (#2 for tickets), Rt7 East Dorset, are all areas to pay extra heed. Also, I91 just south of Brattleboro ands Rt 7 just below Shelburne. Patrolling between towns we have the highly trained State Troopers and County Sheriffs..

How fast to go when you are in a hurry? Town is a long way between some times, and few people drive the actual speed limits. If the roads are dry, and it is not just before 9am or just after 5pm, you can usually drive 9 miles over the limit between towns and 5 miles over the limit in town without getting ticketed.

How Vermonter's Drive: First you have to understand something. Vermonter's hate to be passed. Time and again I have been behind someone doing 45mph., only to have them speed up to 60 at the only passing zone for 20 miles. I have occasionally been known to pass in certain safe (but technically no passing) zones when hard pressed. This inevitably leads to the passed car speeding up, and putting on his high beams. He then drives 70mph for the next few minutes, angrily matching my Mario Andretti moves. Eventually he goes back to driving 45mph again. While this is by no means a universal phenomenon, it is common enough to make note of. I find a friendly wave helps, although the sign language back may not always be as kind!

Leaf Peeping Season: Mid October brings the brilliant colors of Autumn. Colors vary North/South, and also by elevation. The entire season lasts about 3 weeks. The views are so extraordinary, I have seen people stop in the middle of a busy road at midday - just stop! As if there was no one else using the road for miles in each direction. Another dangerous tourist practice is driving 25mph in a 50mph zone. In the car you can see them point: "there's a good one, look at that one, no -over there". Needless to say, exercise extra caution when the leaf peepers make their annual migration to the North Country.

Mud Season: Yes, there really is a mud season in Vermont. This is when the snow cover melts and it rains for 3 days to a month straight. The ground becomes saturated and driveways turn to seas of muck. Particularly hard hit are our unpaved back roads. I try to drive on them as little as possible for the typical 3 bad weeks in March/early April. Ruts develop, and when you try to drive around them you get sucked in, further exasperating the problem. Forget any thought of clean cars, shoes, clothes, etc. Gotta Love it! Springs on the way!

The Mountain: This applies to any of the ski areas in Vermont, inevitably referred to by locals as simply "The Mountain". Access roads typically lead to (from our perspective) overpriced accommodations, food and entertainment. Kind of like a piece of Downcountry transplanted here. Lots of people pulling in and out, and most have been drinking, or are planning on drinking. These roads are well patrolled. Do the speed limit and watch out for the other guy.

Farm Equipment: Vermont is a rural countryside, and it is not uncommon to see farm machinery, including huge manure spreaders out on the main roads. Relax and be patient. They live here and this is their work. In a few minutes they will turn off onto a field to do their thing. Some of the equipment moves from side to side so exercise extreme caution when attempting to pass any farm machinery!

Ever notice those yellow rectangular signs with black arrows? They are placed at the beginning of curves. One means be careful, two means we mean it and three signs means slow the ^%#& down! These become especially important when the roads are slick or snowy.

How to drive in inclement weather: When friends visit from Florida they are always scared to death at the prospect of having to drive on snowy roads. However when I ask them about driving on sand blown roads they say, "Oh that's easy. Don't hit the brakes or do anything sudden and you won't skid out of control. Use the engine and the gears to slow you down". The same rules apply to icy or snowy roads. Remember: snowy, curvy roads and being in a hurry do not mix! Neither does overcompensating by creeping along at 15mph on a main road or going down a mountain. You may risk being rear-ended!

If you do go into a ditch, you will find many friendly, helpful people appearing out of nowhere to make sure you are OK. Many of them are members of the local Rescue Squad or Volunteer Fire Department and welcome the opportunity to put some of that hero training to work. Pretty much everyone has ended up in a ditch at some point (bad tires and rushing are often the cause), There is no embarrassment in this, and often there is minimal or no damage to the vehicle. My wife says that driving in Vermont requires a fluid sense of being. I think that means that circumstances change rapidly and it is best to be aware and alert - especially if you do not know the roads or are driving a rental car.

Animals in the road: No description of driving in our beautiful state would be complete without a word about the many animals found on and in our roadways (no jokes about roadkill pot lucks please!). Always be alert for the local fauna. Of course we have the moose. Known locally as a swamp donkey, this is a creature the size of a small elephant, and possessing the intelligence of roughly a worm. Frequently known to stand in the road staring blankly at your oncoming headlights. Also known to go jogging down mountain roads. Has been documented falling in love with a local cow. It's greatest menace however is that every passerby will immediately pull over and gawk at the sight of one, posing a life threatening peril to all approaching drivers. Moose are so huge they stand over the car itself. Truly the most dangerous creature in the state on four legs.

Occasionally a farmer will lead his milk cows across the main road to the far field. Rare enough to be picturesque. Prepare for a 5 minute wait. I have rarely seen a cow wandering in the road. Cows are kind of dumb and drooly. I have always suspected that the feed is drugged. Even on the rare occasions when one or two will break loose, they seem to prefer munching the long grass around the fence line to ending up steak tartare on blacktop platter.

Watch for deer during Hunting Season (Deer Season is a very good time to avoid walks in the woods). The deer get spooked and may run suddenly across the road. They tend to cross at the same places year to year. Look for those deer alert signs and be especially vigilant at sunset. I scan from side to side along the road when in known crossing zones during Deer Season.

Skunk in/on road. Avoid at all cost. It may take days to get the smell off your car.

Squirrels/chipmunks. I love and respect nature, but I refuse to put my car in a ditch because some nut eater is once again running across the road (sorry Chippy). If you miss them, they will be doing it again in 15 minutes.

Seriously folks, be ever alert to animals big and small, and especially children in the road. My wife told me to put this in.

So Buckle Up and enjoy your visit to God's Country. Ya'll come back ya'hear!

The Soap Crew

*This article was written for entertainment purposes only. The views expressed herein do not necessarily reflect those of Vermont Soap, it's employees, Board of Directors, the company that hosts our website or any of the hundreds of thousands of people who use our stuff.